Pete and I have a handful of very good friends. Without who we would not have the support and love we got during this very trying time in our lives. People who actually get it. They understand pain and trauma because of the horrendous events that unfolded in their lives. Understanding and love is the cornerstone of friendship. When the people from our church pushed us to the sidelines (those who ALWAYS said “love you guys“) our friends carried us through. Heartbreak is not understood by everyone, some people THINK they’ve endured heartbreak, but most have never experienced true heartbreak. Pete and I always thought we had a sense of family in our church, turns out we were very very wrong. We have had more support from our friends, some of who weren’t even in our church, than the so-called “family in Christ” at our then church.
We had the most fantastic time with our friends on Sunday, we laughed and spoke and laughed some more! We all (our friends included) knew, that we would be there for one another no matter what, no amount of busyness or issues would come in the way, and that’s true friendship. They have gone through some hard traumas in their lives, with profound loss, so they get it. They understood the need to just be, not speak to anyone, not put on a brave face for the sake of whoever, but just to be. I value that more than everything.
Pete and I also learnt very quickly that not everyone who has endured loss in their lives truly understand, or care for that matter what others go through. It was a hard lesson to learn, but a valuable lesson, and just because someone calls themselves a christian or a leader, doesn’t mean they’re going to support you in your difficult time.
Pete also sees my sister and BIL as our friends, not just family, but true friends. We’ve been told (my sister and I) on many occasions, how rare our closeness is, and we do know that we are truly blessed to have the kind of relationship that we do. They have supported us through so much over the years and vice versa. We value and appreciate them just as much as our other friendships. Pete and I see one another as best friends, he’s always here for me, and I’ll always support him in whatever he does, he is my bestest friend.
I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.
“Friendship is the bond between hearts and the bridge between souls. Wayne Visser.